Get Out of Your Head and Into Your Heart

  Finally, all of you, be like-minded, be sympathetic, love one another, be compassionate and humble.

                                                         I Peter 3:8

 I had an appointment this morning with my favorite doctor.  He is kind, intelligent, and compassionate.  I am sure he has his faults too, but he is always patient with whatever complaint I have to offer.  Lately, I have been struggling with my bipolar and the paranoia that seems to have accompanied it.  It has made me defensive and argumentative to my poor husband (Who has gently been by my side for years, through all of this) and many others.

 Back to my doctor.  Today he seemed a bit distant and withdrawn.  Upon contemplating this after getting offline, I immediately assumed that he was upset with me.  That is the paranoia talking.  After about a half an hour of wallowing in my self-pity, I felt a little tap on my shoulder.  It was the Holy Spirit reminding me of what I had been told by others as I have slogged through this mire.  “Get out of your own head and look around you” “What other reasons could there be for this”

 I had not considered this perspective, and as I did, I was ashamed.  This person who almost always has time for me might be having difficulty himself.  I was offline, the opportunity was over.  I know I should have at least asked “How are you today?”, but all I could think of were my own complaints.

 I am glad I am growing.  I am glad others are helping me to take the focus out of my own mind and into the world around me.  I wish I had said those simple words this morning, but the fact that I realized that the paranoia was false once again is a big step forward for me.

 Now what can I do for my friend?  The most powerful thing I know of is to pray for him and his family.  He and his wife are lovely people and do so much for others that they should not be forgotten themselves.  At my next visit, I will make sure that the first words I utter are “Hi, how are you. I have been praying for you lately”