Author Archives: rolandsmommy59

Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. 1 Thessalonians 5:18  This is a hard verse.  When your life is sailing along smoothly, vacations every year, healthy children obeying you in your home, this is easy.  It has become very hard for me.  I am angry,Continue reading “Gratitude”

ECT has given me a chance at a new life, a life I can live more deliberately.  A life I will hopefully live with more passion.  The question remains, who do I want to be when I grow up?  I look at the world around me, especially the world I have been exposed to, andContinue reading “Who Will I Be When I Grow Up?”

Are we responsible for the illnesses we contract?  I had someone imply this to me this morning about mental illness, that we were somehow responsible for having the disease and getting rid of it.    Now I have been fighting this battle for years.  I think I can firmly say that I have never heardContinue reading “Brain Cooties”

 I visited my primary doc this morning.  We have a longstanding relationship, so I was very curious to see what changes he saw in me since I have had my first ECT treatments.  I was astounded at his perception.  I didn’t have much to say for myself, because, frankly, words aren’t coming easily to meContinue reading “An Illness in Review”

As you can tell from these posts, I am pretty confused these days.  I have been repeatedly placed in a psychiatric ward, yet I can count on one hand the visits from my fellow church members.  Sure, I was unable to communicate with other people outside, but I know that others knew I was in.Continue reading “How Does Christ’s Love Work?”

A Long Time Away When will this end?  I’m home again, this time after three weeks in the hospital – Norwood Hospital this time.  I feel like a shell of myself.  I’ve been forced to succumb to treatments I have never seriously considered before – ECT.  When I say I feel like a shell ofContinue reading “A Long Time Away”

Icky, icky illnesses. Just a short note today.  I got out of the hospital yesterday morning, and now have picked up a stomach bug.  Fortunately I have the world’s best husband who cleans up after me and cuddles me when I feel rancid!  A new post in a few days.  God is revealing so muchContinue reading “1/20/2017”

I know I’m writing about my illness pretty consistently since October, and to be fair, that is the main purpose of this blog.  When I was first given the vision for the blog, it was to chronicle my struggles with mental illness and how Christ has met me at my best and worst to giveContinue reading “Do I Honor Christ?”

I’ve been encouraged to write once again.  It’s hard, because, yes, I’ve been in the hospital – AGAIN.  This time, I’ve come out feistier than usual.  I am in a fighting mood, not wanting any nonsense, and the nonsense found me.  My most recent prescriber is retiring and I am faced with finding another.  ForContinue reading “Of Struggles and Faith”

This has been a highly unusual year for me.  I’ll recap, not to look back, but to give vantage to my readers.  March came in with an extensive abdominal surgery.  Took a few months of recovery, but I was able to finish my courses for the semester. re  Unfortunately, I was refusing to recognize thatContinue reading “Heaven and Nature Sing”